"Identity theft is not a joke, Jim! Millions of families suffer every year!"

I learned from my Public Speaking teacher that if you really want to captivate your audience you need to open with a quote and honestly I cannot think of anything more captivating than a quote from the Office where Dwight is complaining about something that Jim has done (this case being that Jim has dressed and is acting like Dwight at work.) It seemed fitting though that almost a month hiatus from this blogoshphere I needed something monumental to happen so I could make a glorious return my blog and my fans and as of last evening I thought that had happened. Yesterday I put my notice in at Dunkin' Donuts (for a second time) and officially made up my mind that I will be moving back home to the suburbs of Williamsburg to realize my dream of being a full-time substitute teacher and to be Coach Bo once again. It will all set up for me too except that when I got home I opted to watch the Pacer game instead of this blog which at the time seemed like a good idea that way I could rip the Pacers for their 900th loss of the season by a combined two points. And I was off of work today so I could devote my entire day to this blog (that is until 9 PM where Raw/Pacer Game/Turk Night begins). So anyway everything was going to plan until about 8 AM this morning when I was woken up to a call from my bank informing me that my identity had been stolen. Yes you heard me, someone thought that my life was so great that they wanted to be a part of it. Anyway lets move on and talk about what this wannabe would rather have than my money, my life.

I'm running (out) on Dunkin' Take 2

As mentioned before this gent has decided to run as far away as he can from the coffee business and actually start to try to get a career in what he went to school for almost a decade for, being a teacher. And let me tell you something, nothing makes you feel more appreciated than when you tell your boss that you quit and they don't even care if you put in a two weeks notice but just want you to make sure you tell them if you're going to be there for the next week before they make the schedule and don't want to have redo it if you're not going to be there. Oh, Dunkin love.

In Sean We Trust

Well after the Pacers lost their 10th game of the season last night by less than four points it would be pretty easy for me to dog our hometown boys. But since as of late you have decided to give Larry's guys a tongue thrashing after every loss I have decided to talk about a cheerier subject. Actually on second thought I got nothing so I am going to use this space to advertise the subletting of my apartment here in Bloomington. If anyone is interested in a 1 bedroom apt in Bloomington on the corner of 7th and Dunn please let me know. My least last from now until August and rent is $400 a month with free water and parking, yes you heard me that's free water AND parking.

Something for Sara

You've been begging me for your own segment for months so here you are and after much deliberation I have decided to combine this segment with a John Cusack reference from the movie High Fidelity and give you my top 5's on random subjects. And this week in honor of me moving we're going to look at the top 5 places I've lived in my life:

5. Park Doral. I lived here with Adam the semester before we both left to student teach. We were one of the few white people at this apartment complex but enjoyed the pool and the spacious rooms at this apartment. Number One moment at this apartment had to be the fact that we never turned on the heat at this apartment even though we lived there well into December. brrr.

4. Greenwood. Living with Sean (Chuck) the six weeks before his marriage were both liberating to me and Ringo. Number one moment at this apartment would of been WWE's one night stand where Batista absolute destroyed HBK in a stretcher match. I believe it was this moment where Sean officially became a wrestling lifer. yeah!

3. 7th and Dunn. It's the apartment I currently have and although I live by myself its closeness to campus and to the bars makes it very guest friendly. Number one moment would be my birthday this year where we were piled 7 deep in my place and I slept on the floor somehow while multiple people slept in my bed. weird.

2. The Villas. This was a year and a half of total ridiculousness. There's no reason anyone ever needs to live in an apartment with 5 people but it was sure was fun though. Number one moment was celebrating Little 5 there with the almost 30 people that stayed at our place. yikes

1. "The Apartment". Anything that you refer to as just "the apartment" is probably going to win this category but this was the first place I ever lived at after High School back in Lynn. It was a quaint apartment located directly above the bank and living there with Chris was a great life experience. Best moment there would be the shot dedication night where I dedicated every shot I took (21 of them) to a random girl that I knew/had dated/wanted to date. Anyway if that wasn't enough I decided to write out my dedications as I took my shots on a piece of paper that Steve-0 has framed to this day. According to my hand writing I did well until about 8 or 9 but then by 15 no names are legible and only about half the numbers are. good times.

A Love Story

This segment is usually dedicated to a failed love story of either myself or a friend of mine but since my Identity Theft Perpetrator decided to use my ID for purchases on match.com I'm going to assume that him stealing my money is going to lead to true love for him/her and they will learn nothing from this experience. So let me be the first person to congratulate you on your new found love life.

Inspiration for Tom

In case you hadn't gotten enough from Teen Wolf mania as of late here's a doozy of a quote from Coach Finstock:

"It doesn't matter how you play the game, it's whether you win or lose. And even that doesn't make all that much difference."